Why We Play..

So, after yesterday's post, I asked Bee about football. I asked him why he loved the game so much. Why is it, they in order to feed us and help keep a roof over our heads, he has to work, and his job requires much physical labor, and yet, he risks it all by going out to play that one.last.game.

He responded by showing me something he wrote right before we started dating. It kinda made my eyes a little leaky to read it. Something about how he shows his passion (and, he's not a bad writer, to boot! ;)  )

Anyway, I thought I would share it here... enjoy!

Why We Play

"When I was a boy, I stepped out onto the field. I stood between friends in the backyard and drew up plays in the dirt. We were just kids, dreaming of being men. Pushing, shoving, tackling, and running. We were neighborhood kids, playing games on the neighborhood lot. In my backyard we were heroes.

We beat each other up. Yelled and screamed. Pretended that we hated each other. But by the time our moms called us to come home for dinner we were planning the next days game. We would play til dark. We would play in the rain. We played in the snow. All for the love of the game.

In the summer it was baseball. Basketball in the spring. But we waited all year for Fall. The leaves would change and the footballs would come out of hibernation. The jerseys would come out of the dressers. The old pants and sweatshirts would come out of the closet. Mom would stock up on bandages and make sure she had a bag for ice.

When high-school came and two-a-days hit, we hit each other like rams in a fight. Battering each other senseless. Trying to kill the very guy that would have your back on Friday night. We would jockey for position, trying to be the star. Competing for that glory and fame. We tried to make sure the cheerleaders all knew our names.

As much as we competed and fought with each other, if we were out on Saturday night and ran into a rival we had each others backs. A fight among friends, on your home turf was one thing. But the enemy was another. If I got in trouble with the guy from another school, my neighbor was there to have my back.

Some of us left for the military, some for college, some stayed home and learned on the streets. But whether we were in some kind of uniform or just the neighborhood gang we were still a team. We still had each others backs. We were still a team.

You never forget your teammates. They never forget you. They always remember. There was good, and there was bad. But somehow the bad is forgotten, and either the good or the embarrassing are all that remains. We played for many reasons. And some of us still do. But when we were young the only one that mattered was the most important one. And it was the same for all of us then, just like it is for us now.
It was all for the love of the game. "

- Bee

Now What?

Well, it's done. Officially done. What will we do with ourselves?

Football is over.

Done.

Fineto.

Fin.

Well, until January that is :) C's team played their final game of the year this weekend and Bee doesn't have another football related game/practice until after Christmas. Then, once January starts, we have indoor flag, and we will start indoor training and conditioning for Bee's team. Of course, we always have NFL Football. And the Turkey Bowl. And I can guarantee you that if another owner called up Bee on the phone, tonight, and said "Hey, let's get a game for the weekend, or Tomorrow" Bee would be there, with bells on, and at least 11 guys to field a team.

It's weird to me how these guys will do anything for one last game. No matter how old they are. What is it about the game that is so compelling? I mean, I know it's fun to watch. I get caught up in my black and gold teams. I live and die through them too, but honestly, what makes you keep wanting to strap up and get out there when it's cold, hot, snowy, raining, hailing, whatever? Why is it these guys will give up time with their family, their Xbox, their girlfriends/wives, sleep, TV and risk their health for this game?

I know a guy, one of Bee's friends, who is in his late 30's. He has a wife, a business, 4 kids, and a house. He plays semi-pro football and in the first 3 minutes of their playoff game, he tore his Achilles tendon. It snapped and rolled right up like a cheap set of window shades. He couldn't walk or control his foot. He had surgery and now has an incision that is 13 inches long. He spent 6 weeks in a wheelchair and is now just getting to the point he can rehab it and walk on it. Doctor says he was lucky he is able to walk on it again, he will be lucky to get 75-80% of mobility to the foot back, and should he get that or more, he should definitely NOT play anymore because should it get hit again, they probably won't be able to save the tendon. He's hitting the gym and training for next season. Say's he'll be back, better than ever.

Stupid? Sure. However, Bee would do the same thing. What is it that is so seductive about this sport? You don't see baseball, basketball, rugby, tennis, or soccer players act that way. For those who have played the game, they often refer to it like a battle or a war when you are in the huddle or on the sidelines, yet it really is nothing like that. Ask anyone who's actually BEEN to war, yet, every player I know, treats his teammates like a brother in arms.

It's perplexing to me that after a week or two, Bee starts to get the "itch". I've never had anything in my life like that...however, I think it's great he does. I love supporting him and his interests, and to be honest, what girl DIDN'T want to date the football star??

Wasn't I JUST saying...

So, about two months ago, I wrote an entry about needing a friend. Someone who understood me. Someone who was happy to talk when we could get a few minutes, but would not hold it against me if it had been a few days since we talked. Someone who "got" my situation with Bee and maybe even was in a similar situation. Someone who was close enough in physical distance that we could grab dinner without an overnight bag in tow....

God always listens. He always knows what we need when we need it. Two things have happened since that post.

BFF Rose and I have sat down and hashed out all the events of this summer. This time around it was her doing the apologizing. Last year at this time, it was me. I guess we are both growing in our friendship and learning to adapt our friendship to our changing lives. She will always be my BFF Rose and she will always be like my sister, even if we don't talk every day or see each other every day. Our friendship has survived so much in the past 6 years,  I am pretty sure it will never ever break. And for that? I am most thankful.

The second thing that has happened is, I think I have found the exact friend I described in my post from two months ago.

The weird thing is, I've sort of have known her for awhile. However, the three or four times we've met, I was drunk, in the middle of team stuff and couldn't really socialize, drunk, or arrived as she was leaving.

She is the girlfriend of one of the players on Bee's old team. He is considering joining the new team (and I hope he does!) but is weighing his options. Anyway, our guys are VERY much alike. They honestly, weather THEY like it or not, could be twins. They both have pasts they just can't seem to get rid of, and part of them I think doesn't WANT to...not because they want to be back with that person/in that situation, but because it's familiar and/or "easy" when you know what you're dealing with. Bee even "stole" this guy's girlfriend at one time.

Miss A and I share a LOT of the same frustrations with our men. Yet, we both take comfort in the fact that we broke up with our guys, and were chased by them until we took them back after being woo'ed and had love professed to us. (We were even "broken up" the same amount of time!) Both of our guys have made HUGE life changes in the past 6-8 months that they wanted to make anyway, but never had the motivation to do these things until it meant not getting us back.

While Miss A has kids of her own, she also knows what it's like for me because her guy has kids too. He has shared custody and has the fun of dealing with ex's, ex's family, and so on and so forth. Plus, we have so much in common otherwise! We like the same things, music, a love for Bon Jovi, and taste in fashion (although, there are some boots that I really want that she swears she will hold an intervention if I try to buy ha!) She lives close enough that we can get together for dinner, or just to hang out and we don't have to travel halfway across the state to do it, and I like that too.

She is super sweet and I am so glad I went to Bee's All-Star game and got to "meet" her all over again. I also look forward to the wonderful friendship that we've started!

Warning, rambling ahead!

This was by far, one of the best weekends I have had in awhile.

Friday, Little Man and I were some baking fools! First, he helped me make dinner. By helping, I mean that he stood in the kitchen with me talking my ear off and asking questions ranging from how the Earth was made to the Quantum Physics of being a really real air bender, all at rapid-fire speed. I made pineapple-teriyaki chicken stir fry in case you are wondering.

And yes, I do amaze even myself.

After dinner, C wanted to help bake, but decided she was too tired and had a very important all-star game the next day, and she should just go to bed. It was 7:30pm. I love my kids :) Anyway, J was up in her room, as usual, and little man was helping me with dishes (much like he helped me make dinner).

Then, the baking started.

He cracked the eggs. He poured in all the liquid elements. He pushed all the buttons that required being pushed. He unwrapped Hershey Kisses. He even helped spoon cookies on to the cookie sheet. However, his most important job, the one he took most seriously, the super secret, do-not-tell-anyone, secret taste tester. 

When all was said and done, he Little Man was finally in bed, we had made, 6 1/2 dozen peanut blossom cookies, 2 dozen white chocolate chip, two loaves of pumpkin bread, one loaf of Ba'napple bread, one pumpkin pie, one pumpkin cheesecake. Then I collapsed into bed.

Apparently, I have the palsy when it comes to taking pictures...

Saturday we got up, we went to C's All-star  game, in the SNOW, where she won 44-0. And Bee coached! And J and Little man camped out in the car! And I was "forced" to stand next to Grandma and Grandpa S for an hour and a half and have uncomfortable conversation! The thing about Grandma and Grandpa S, is this: Grandpa S says very little. That makes me nervous. Grandma S talks to me like she's some innocent church lady who is only surrounded by kittens, rainbows, and prayers all day. They are nice to me. However, since I like to see the good in people, I want to take that at face value. Like we've turned a corner. However, in reality, I know she is the mother to Bee's ex-wife and will be forever loyal to her daughter. Can't say I blame her, or even that I want to be "friends" with her...but I find myself wanting to say things to her in conversation, but I keep having to remind myself to keep my guard up because I am sure (in fact, I know) she takes the good, bad, and the ugly, and reports it all back to her daughter.

Today though, today she actually felt the need to tell me that her daughter isn't a bad person. She's a wonderful person with a loving and kind heart. I told her, that's fine. I don't judge people I don't know, but that she DOES need to wake up and realize THIS is HER life that SHE chose. Bee is still the father of their kids. She is still their mother, and will always be and we will never interfere with her role as their mother, however, she will NOT get bee back. He has no interest. He's told her, and his actions have proven it. He will NOT bring the kids to see her, she can worry about making the arrangements and while she is free to keep acting and pretending like when she gets out they'll be one big happy family, together again, she only makes herself look crazy and desperate, and it will only hurt the kids in the end. Grandma S's response was simply "Yeah, I know. But, she will NEVER stop loving him. It's hard for her"

My response? Well, keep it yourself. And really? Put on your big girl panties and get the eff over it. I loved my "first love" for a long time too, but one day I realized all the time and effort I was wasting pining after some guy who had NO desire to be with me....it made me look foolish. I guess when you are used to getting every.little.thing. you want and doing whatever it takes to get it, even stealing, then it's a hard lesson to learn.

 Anyway, afterwards, we went to Bee's meeting where we had a nice little turn out, and the baked goods gotten eaten up real quick. Then, we headed home. We ran out of time between C's game and Bee's meeting, so we had the kids with us, and C was filthy, and my parents had been at our house by themselves for 3 hours....so we decided not to go to the movie premiere. Oh well, can't say I was all that bummed.

We got home, mama had dinner ready, and the kids were so happy to see her and my dad that they about burst. Little Man ran into the house so fast, that by the time Bee and I made it inside, he was already in a chair as close to my mom as he could get talking her ear off at the speed of light. We ate, we talked, we laughed, we planned Thanksgiving, and my sister gave me my birthday presents early since she is working next weekend when my birthday actually comes around. She got me a bottle of my favorite sparkling wine, a purse, and a new wallet.



Why yes, my wallet is supposed to look like naughty girl panties ;)



We stayed up late, eating, cooking, talking, and having a good time. Even Bee! He sat and played rock band with my sister and they were laughing like crazy! Then, we all went to bed and Sunday, mama and I made breakfast consisting of eggs, toast, and cinnamon rolls! Then, Little Man glued himself to her side and talked non-stop for hours. The kids, save C, opted to stay home with my parents and sister while Bee and I took C to round two of the All-Star game. Unfortunately they lost, but Grandma and Grandpa S did overhear the parents of one of the boys on C's team talk about how much their son had a crush on "that girl that plays on his team" ;)

We came home and mama had dinner ready again. We all ate, and socialized a bit more, and then they went home. I cleaned up after the weekend (I love my family dearly and I love when they come out for a visit, but they tear.my.house.UP when they are there), and then it was time to prepare for the week. I made sure clothes were folded and put away, kids got baths, and lunches were made. I finally sat down to chill with Bee at 8:00pm and we were in bed by 9:30pm. We needed the sleep! :)

It was a great weekend, and I can't wait to see what next weekend brings, because it's my BIRTHDAY! :)

Lebron James "Rise" Commercial & Cleveland's Response

AMEN, CLEVELAND! :)
(Love my city!)

Just because I feel like sharing!

~Mama, Poppy, and Siso have come out for the weekend. The kids get super excited when my family comes around and we usually have a countdown of some sort until they arrive. I still am not clear on weather it's because they really ENJOY my family, or if it's because my family feels the need to "buy" their love, and always brings them some sort of treat and or present. Or if it's a little of both..

~I am new to the whole "my parents have grand kids now" situation, so maybe it's not so much "buy their affection" as it's "just what grandparents do". Bee's mom always gets them something too. Not so much the other grandparents. But then again, they are mainly just show pieces, so why would you??

~I decided to bake goodies for Bee's football meeting, and the kids wanted to help. Well, I am a control freak, and a neat freak, so my synapses were firing on rapid, and I really wanted to tell them to leave me be, but, they're kids, and kids love to bake. I remember helping my mama out when I was a kid and I loved it. So, I decided they could help me make the cookies! They were totally stoaked and the best part? They get bored with it after 10 minutes and want to go play.

~My work owns a media company. I find this odd because it has absolutely nothing to do with what the rest of the company does, but whatever. Anyway, our media company did a documentary film on the world of competitive checkers in a small South African city. Sounds boring, I know, but it was actually really cool. They are having a one-time premiere of the movie before it goes off to all the film festivals tonight at 7pm and I was invited +one. So, if we get done in time, Bee and I are going to go. It's kinda a little bit swanky and I like that we get to do stuff like that from time to time :) Our Media company also did the opening video for all the Cleveland Caviler's games last season and this season too. They won an award for last seasons'!

~C has her all star game this weekend. I hope the snow holds off!

~I worry every day if I am making a positive impact on the kids, or if I am just that grumpy, nagging lady who scolds them a lot more than I used to...

~I hate talking money with Bee. HATE. If I could trust him to be organized enough to handle the bills and make sure they all got paid, and on time, I would gladly hand it all off to him and just write him a check twice a month. Even he agrees, It's better I do it.

~My favorite part of the day is bed time. It's the only time when we are not distracted by the tv, our laptops, text messages, the phone ringing, kids, or anything else for that matter. We cuddle, we talk, we giggle, and then it's time to sleep the sleep of angels!

~I look forward to that blissful week or two when no one has ANYTHING going on.

Sometimes....

Beauty, in the form of a picture, can take your breath away and help you remember "God is GREAT!"

Eat it, it's good for you!

I find myself saying that more times in one week than I have ever said in my life time.

I am not the best when it comes to nutrition. I was a fat kid. Like, seriously, a fat kid. My mom and dad were fat too, so it's not like they really knew either. Of course, they came from a different generation, but I digress.

No matter how I used to eat, or how I currently eat, I am now responsible for what goes into little mouths. I don't cook uber healthy. I don't do weekly or bi-monthly shopping like I would want to. The kids and bee don't really care for fruit, and the little one especially doesn't like vegetables. I am tired when I get home, and watch to cook something fast, simple, and something I know all of them will eat without a hassle.

Chicken fingers (home made and oven "fried") mashed potatoes, meatloaf, mac and cheese, hot dogs, hamburgers, Shepard's pie, and pasta seem to be what we eat All. The. Time. Oh, and Chicken Noodle soup.

Anyway, I figure while it's not the most healthy, and I could do some major improvements, I figure, it's sooooooo much better than what they got before I came along which was pb&j sandwiches for lunch, every day and a juice box and for supper, they had whatever fast food was on the way home and NOT McDonalds (Bee only likes their breakfast). Everyday. Without fail.

Little man's new obsession is reading the nutrition labels on everything. E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. Every day at breakfast we learn what the daily % values are for the milk, bread, and our vitamins. Dinner and snack are the same routine. His pure thirst for knowledge astounds me.

At least now when I tell him to eat it because it's good for you, he can tell me why!

But....they're smarter than me!

What do you do when your child is smarter than you?

I was a smart kid in school. I always had straight A's until I hit 6th grade. The change from one classroom to changing classes and having a locker, in a locker ROOM, where I had to fight 17 other kids around me for space, AND made it to my bus on time, really messed me up. Then, I got friends, and didn't care.

However, weather or not it showed, I paid attention in class. With the exception of Chemistry and Algebra II, I learned everything they taught us. Then, when I graduated, my mom was sick. My dad was the only one working, my sister and brother were young, and the family didn't have the money for me to go to school. Sure, I could have gotten loans, but it would have been my parents who needed to get the loans, and I couldn't strap them tighter than they already were. Especially, since I had no idea what I wanted to do for sure and if I could even hack it in College. I mean, I wanted to go, but I was realistic when faced with the choice of going to class, or screwing off at the mall, or just sleeping in, I knew what would win out. I was 18 and dumb, but not naive.

Anyway, I got a job. A good one. Moved out (within 15 minutes of home, in case they needed me) and well, life took over. Now, I would love to go to college, even a community college, but I don't have the time, the money, or the patience.

I consider myself smart. I have a good street smarts about me. I'm not as book smart as I used to be, but I love to read and learn. I took my ACT test in High School and scored a 29. Perfect score is 32 or 34. I can't remember, but the fact is, I'm left behind.

My seven year old came home and told me his class just got a Promethean board. Yeah, I had to google it too. His whole class is trying to go paperless. His whole class is taught from this board. All interim and report cards are now online. Each student has an id# which is their user id. Any student, in any class or grade, can go anywhere in the whole entire district, including the public library, or even at home sit down at a computer, log on to the school's network, and do their school work, all homework is listed online, homework papers are in digital form online, you do all your work online and hit submit, and it gets sent to their teacher.

It blows my mind. I know how advanced my school work was compared to when my parents went to school, and yet it still amazes me how much more advanced they are. I honestly don't think his class even has a chalk board. In one way, I am super excited that these kids can learn in ways we never thought possible, and I even wonder if I would have been more compelled to do my homework and pay more attention in class had I gotten to use this technology, but on the other hand, it makes me a little sad that they'll never get the trill of being chosen to clap erasers (or embarrassment, if it's a punishment), or help the teacher out by delivering a message to a classroom down the hall. Or smell the fresh chalk on the first day of school, or try to pay attention those last few weeks while it's so hot and the dust from the board is so thick in the air. Never feel the rush of excitement that you get to use the computers today, or that we get to do math on our slates again! Although, I am sure, they have much cooler stuff to play with now.

The hardest part is when he comes home at looks at me with his 7 year old eyes, confident that because I am older than he, I know everything, then asks me a question that I have no idea the answer to, nor can I make anything up that sounds smart enough to be the truth. Nor, can I understand how he would even think to ask this question in the first place....

I guess that's the school doing it's job. Making the next generation stronger, better, smarter, and faster....

Blue Steel...

My Neice Isabella doing her best "Blue Steel" Impression...just like her Daddy :)

My Neices on Halloween!