Picture conglomeration!

I have some pictures that I wanted to share from the last few days. There are a bunch. Some from C's game (she is nuber 4! woot woot!) and some from my walks with Gypsy! Enjoy!

The sky at C's Scrimmage on Thursday night

One of the houses in our neighborhood. Gypsy and I enjoyed this on our walk on Saturday.

My Church. When I *need* to get back to :)

Our community is very Patriotic

I put the picture through a filter :)

Bee standing around with two other coaches and one of their daughters

C pacing on the sideline on Sunday

Touchdown Storm Black!!!

This was in front of us at the game. Thunder and black clouds were behind us!

C bookin down field

I got this!

That's a hold.

My neighborhood

The Sky is on fire :)

I think someone killed the gingerbread man....

I need a break from my breaks!

Well, last week was full of things! My life is crazy, I don't know what made me think adding a geriatric dog to the mix would make it any less so. Ha! :)

Gypsy has done well. I have finally calmed down and so  has she. She knows her favorite spots to sleep now. She knows our routine. She knows Ms. Kitty's spots and tries to avoid them too. :) Ms. Kitty and her are not friends, but they are co-habitatting at least. You should see though their reaction when the other one is getting love from me. Bee and the kids can love on them alllll day and it won't affect the other, but let me hold Ms. Kitty or pet her, or pet Gypsy and talk to her and the other goes crazy. I guess it feels good to be loved? :)

All three kids left on Friday. J went to her mom's, and the wee ones went to Grandma and Grandpa's. So, Bee and I went to dinner. I was feeling emotional, girlie, and needy (There comes a time, every month, where us girls get like that...) and I was being all over sensitive about something Bee said and I cried and argued all through our nice meal at my favorite restaurant that he was trying for the first time. I will say however, that it wasn't all me. He was being at least 25% insensitive. By the time the check came, we were fine. We headed over to Home Depot to get some paint for helmets and head home for the night. However, one of Bee's friends text him. She was in the area and wanted to know if we wanted to meet for a drink. So we did.  She was very nice :) We had a drink or two, then headed home. We watched some TV (thrilling, I know...) and went to bed.

Saturday, I got up first. I walked Gypsy, went to the store, and came home and made breakfast in bed for my Bee :) After we ate, we watched our Sons Of Anarchy and got all caught up. After that I went outside to tackle the jungle that was our yard.

Ya'll...

Words can't even explain.

Look, when we moved, the yard was beautiful. Nicely done. Nothing super fancy. However, it was late August. All we had to do was mow the lawn once a week and we were golden. I had big plans for our yard. Ok, well, not big, but I wanted a garden. Then Spring came and it rained for 4697345 days straight. And then like *that*, it was Summer, and it was 1000 degrees, and every free moment of my life I was running here and there. My kids, who's job it is to mow the lawn (honestly? I haven't touched a mower since I was 8. Even then, it was one time) were almost never home for more than a day at a time this Summer. I was happy to get the lawn mowed! My beautiful yard turned into a jungle. A real life jungle! I swear, I saw monkeys the other day! My beautiful flowering bushes that are so pretty in the Spring? Yeah, "weed trees" as I call them sprouted up in the middle of them! The Ivy that started off looking so nice in the front beds? TOOK OVER MY FRONT STEPS! I mean it! You could not SEE the steps any longer. It was coming out of the beds into the grass too!

I threw on jeans, tennis shoes and socks, long sleeves, and work gloves. I grabbed the "clippy-snippy things" as I call them, and giiiiirrrrlll....I went to town on my front yard. I told Bee if I could just get THAT done, I would call it a success. I would worry about the back and side yards another day. I clipped, snipped, swore, swatted, pulled, raked, and trimmed for 2 hours. The front isn't 100% done. There are a few "trees", I couldn't get with the snippy things. But it is 99% done and while I have no skill to "manicure" it, it looks 100 times better. At that point, I was exhausted. I was going to take my pile I had raked up and put it in the fire pit, when BEE CAME OUTSIDE! He grabbed the weed eater and mower and went to town on the side and back yard. I grabbed my snippy-clippy things, and joined him. We are not done, but we are 90% there and it looks GREAT! I will say, I am going to stock up on mulch/wood chips over the winter and rain or shine, that stuff is going down! Afterwords, we showered and jumped on the bike and headed up to one of our new spots that is becoming a favorite of ours, Mr. Lee's. It's about 1 1/2 minutes from our house. The beer is cold, and the food is cheap. And awesome! I had Dill Pickle wings. DILL PICKLE! They were EPIC.

We came home, slid into bed, and slept straight through until morning. I got up, took the dog out, got eaten up even more than Saturday, and came right home. Looked in the mirror, between my face, neck, and lower back, I look like I have a bad case of the chicken pox :/ I made breakfast for the Bee and I, and then we headed out to C's football game. Her grandparents were meeting us there with the kids. Apparently, Little man broke his nose on the trampoline this weekend (awesome. Thanks for telling us), and they did not get to see their mom on Saturday because she was ill with the flu. Then, It was "floated" out there that they are going to be gone all of October. The ex asked C if their dad could bring them and she said "Dad says no. He gets physically sick when he comes here" So then she said she would be even willing to put ME on her visitation list so *I* could bring the kids if I was willing. Hmmm...I'd have to think about that one...The day ended on a positive note, C's team won! 34-12!!! Add to that, their loss last week was overturned because the team they played had 13 year old on it and they turned themselves in! Way to go Storm Black!

It was a super busy weekend, and now I look forward to the week. Next weekend will be no different! :)

Like a New baby...but Old and geriatric

Well, last night was night one. I always stress the first night with a pet. I don't enjoy my evening, nor do I sleep well. Last night was no exception. I went out to pick Gypsy up right after work. I got out to my parents house and saw this..

Which, totally made me sad. I never thought I would see the day that my childhood home would be for sale. I always just figured that my parents would live there until they passed. Or, at the very least, I would buy it from them and my family and I would live there. I know, I know. Who does that anymore? My parents offered it to Bee and I, but it is way to small for us :( Not to mention, Bee would be an hour from his job...that starts at 5:45am.

Anyway, I picked up Gypsy, raided the fridge and cupboards for anything I wanted that would spoil before their return, and headed out. Gypsy was not worried in the slightest. Which was good, because she tends to be anxious and nervous. However, she has always loved the car. She takes it very seriously. It's her job, you know...

We then stopped off to see Bee at practice (yes...more football...don't even get me started...told you...year long for us). Gyspy was totally behaving and being a good girl! She barked twice...and that was only because we were right on the sidelines and one guy tackled another right in front of us haha! I thought, "This is going to be great!". We left early, and hit up chick-fil-a because I was STARVING and she needed some water. We finally hit the road abd got home right around 8:30pm.

Gypsy was starting to get tired. She wanted to go home. I didn't know how to express to her, she was "home". At least her home for the next week or so. We came inside and she started getting nervous. The kids all came running at her and she was excited and nervous. Then Ms. Kitty saw her. Ms. Kitty was NOT happy. She went "Halloween Kitty" instantly and started hissing and growlning.  My cat growels, ya'll. Right at that moment, there was a knock at the front door. It was my friend Beth, who lives down the street, who in the last year has never seen the inside of my house! She was walking her old boy (Same age as Gypsy. 11) and thought she would say hi. I broght her in and gave her and her dog a tour and then Gypsy and I went on a walk with her and Samson.We came back and Gypsy was about spent. She barely made it up my back two steps. We came inside and she got two of her 457889439784 pills this dog has to take, and then we waiting on Bee.

Bee came home and we watched a show and then went to bed. I felt so bad though because I took her out once before bed and she ran off the edge of the porch (it was dark, she doesn't know my house yet) and face planted on the cement and rolled a little bit :( she seemed ok though..) Gypsy was starting to get upset. I think she was realizing that my mom wasn't "home yet" and she wasn't in her home. Plus, everytime she caught the cat out of the corner of her eye, she would whine to me like she does at home when there is a cat or another animal in the yard. She doesn't want to hurt it, she just wants ME to know it's there. We went to bed and jealous face (Ms. Kitty) didn't leave our bed for the first time since she has lived with us. Gypsy pretty much fell asleep on the carpet after she inched her way to BEE'S side of the bed (I think he reminds her of my dad) and only whined once or twice. Ms. Kitty on the other hand was all over the bed, in my face, trying to get us to pet her, purring loudly...kept me up half the night between that and worring if Gypsy was ok.

Today, the girls were up at the butt craack of dawn to walk her. She ate her breakfast while they ate theirs, and then she took her pills and went for her walk. She seemed ok, and Ms. Kitty seemed to be not evening really hissing or growling at her anymore (ignoring her mostly) but Gypsy started getting nervous when she saw me getting ready to leave and the kids leave...I hope she does ok today :( I alos hope she settles in a bit more and things become more normal. Until then, it's like babysitting your 95 year old Aunt Sally who has never been to visit...

A Visitor!

My dog (who lives with my parents) is coming to stay with Bee, the kids, and I for a week. Perhaps two. I am very excited, but also very nervous! Gypsy is a good dog. Probably one of the best. However, she is old now and over the years has developed some....anxiety issues.

When I was 19, my little teeny, tiny, 1/3 of a room I lived in (ok, I think it might have been 400 SQ FT) was located IN THE GHETTO. We weren't allowed pets...at ALL, but, the people in front AND the people upstairs had a cat. When a big scary man tried to break into my apartment, I said enough was enough and went to the pound the next day and got a German Shepard/Rottweiler mix. I figured she would grow roughly the size of my couch (she has MASSIVE paws) and scare away anyone or anything who came too close. I crate trained her and every week we went to the pet store and got 5 or 6 new toys. Before I knew it, she had her OWN bag of things I took every where (like a diaper bag) and more often than not, she made me carry her everywhere because the ground was...well...icky.

Eventually, she started to walk places on her own, but insisted on going everywhere with me. Eventually, we moved from that place and the new place we got knew I had her and after I signed a lease, said that Gypsy couldn't come. I was devastated. I was also 20 and didn't know better. Not that it would have mattered, I couldn't really afford the type of places that allow you to have dogs that weren't farther in the ghetto than I was willing to go. I begged and pleaded my parents to take her. They fussed and fussed, but eventually they took her under the condition, I find a place ASAP that allowed dogs. Not long after that, I moved back home. With them. And my dog. I stayed there until I was 26. At that point, Gypsy had a "brother" (a rescue my parents took in) who she was really close with and she was 6, almost 7. I couldn't take her from the only home she really remembered, her companion, or the fact my mom was home with her all day, and where I was going to be living, she would be alone all day except for the cat. She would go from having a yard, to living in an apartment. I didn't think it was fair, and my mom told me I didn't have a choice anyway.

They are taking her with them to Arizona. I am ok with this. She belongs to them now, really. She loves me a lot though. I am her second favorite, and when I come visit them, she firmly throws herself against me and stays that way until I leave. Right now, my mom and sister are going to Michigan for a week or two to leave the house empty for the Realtor. My aunt said that Gypsy can come, but my mom is worried about all the other pets there and how my old girl will handle it. She asked if Bee and I could take her because we have a big house and a big yard and she would be with me. Bee is ok with it, but I worry about my landlord. I asked him on Friday and he said he would let me know by the next day. His concern is fleas. He has yet to get back to me and my mom needs to go, so I said yes.

I worry she will mess on the floor because she doesn't feel comfortable. I worry Ms. Kitty and her will fight. I worry the landlord will be pissed. However, I think it will be ok :) We will need to adjust, but I think it will work out well :) Wish us luck!

Some Things On My Mind...

1. My mom worked at a gas station for about a year a couple of years ago. While she worked there, she became friends with a co-worker. This co-worker of hers is about my age. We have hung out some here and there and the families have gotten together on several occasions and holidays. Over the last three years though, I have seen less and less of her. She has two kids and had met a sweet man who also had a kid. I met bee, moved an hour away, and let's face it, she is a whole lot closer with my mom and my sister anyway. She got married this summer. Everyone knows Summer is my busiest time. She sent, a VERBAL invite to me, Bee, and the kids to her wedding VIA my parents. I asked several times "Is it a Saturday, or a Sunday? If it's a Sunday, we will be there. If it's a Saturday, we can not. Football." I was told it was a SUNDAY. 5 days before the wedding, I saw her for 15 seconds at my parents Anniversary party. My sister forgot to invite them, and invited them last second. They were busy, but stopped by. My parents party was 8 minutes from their house. Anyway, while there, they handed my sister a flyer with directions to their wedding and said "Make sure your sister knows how to get there". I asked once AGAIN, Saturday or Sunday. I was told two days before the wedding, it was actually SATURDAY. I couldn't make it. She is REALLY pissed at me. I say, get over yourself.

2. Love is difficult. In a long term relationship you walk a fine line between happy and content and comfortable with each other and boredom, complacency, and safeness. After what has happened in my life, I am scared to death. However, things have been way better and I think it was a wake up call. Hopefully, it's heeded and not ignored in the long run.....

3. My boyfriend's ex wife is beyond my comprehension. After telling Bee to kiss off a few months ago (which, that in itself is comical...) All she talks about to the kids is her boyfriend John this....her boyfriend John that....he is so rich....he will buy you 4-wheelers....we will pay for college...She told the kids all this and Bee mentioned he was happy to see their mom trying to buy them off, to which "C" replied, " Oh, no! She wants us to NOT take that stuff into account when we make our decision on who we want to live with." I just about jumped out of my skin. REALLY?! We sat them down and explained that "Full Custody" meant basically, they get to read/write her letters, and visit her from time to time out of the kindness of our hearts. Legally, she has no rights to her kids. When she gets out, it will be the word and attempts of a Felon vs. two law abiding citizens who have already provided a stable and loving environment for them. Living with mom is NOT going to happen.

4. Speaking of mom's boyfriend...the kids have never met him. From how they talked, we had the impression The grandparents hadn't either, and more importantly, SHE had never met him. (I know...take a moment and let that all sink in...) So, when in her most recent communique with the kids (a package for C on her birthday) a note said "Keep an eye out for an extra special present from John and I!" I freaked. Because thinking about it, I was afraid it might be a cell phone so that she can talk to her mom whenever. Then, it freaked me out even MORE that some strange man (who I think lives in a different state), has my kids's name and address...I told Bee and he freaked too. So, we talked to the grandparents about it on Sunday...Yeah, no one has met this dude..why? Oh yeah, that's right...HE is in FEDERAL PRISON TOO!!!! However, HE still has access to his computer and runs his business from the "inside". At least I know he is not a child molester, a rapist, or any other violent crime offender...This woman will never see her kids without supervision again...or at least until they are 18...Because two felons living together is against their probation's (when they get out) to begin with...and Bee and I will NOT allow them to see the kids by themselves...

It all boggles my mind, ya'll....

I feel like the ONLY one out of this whole situation who has ANY common sense.

Bee- Loves his kids. Really does. However, dealing with the ex takes him to a dark place, so he prefers to stick his head in the sand and ignore EVERYTHING because it will either work itself out, or go away.

EX: HATES Bee, for moving on and divorcing her. Wants to do anything and everything to hurt him and piss him off...yet all of it is really just a desperate cry to "look at me! Take me back!"

New Boyfriend : Mixed up in all of this. He is going to get bled dry, and left...either because she will find someone else, or end up BACK in prison...my guess is on the latter

Grand Parents: They are happy EX has a boyfriend because that equals someone to take care of her which means she won't be living with them. Yet, the whole situation is way embarrassing. What will people think? On top of dealing with their other kid who is getting a divorce...which is really the shocker of the family.

The one thing missing from all of this? Who is thinking of the KIDS?! Yeah, that would be me. The only one out of this equation (well, maybe the new boyfriend...I don't know anything about him) who does not share DNA with these kids, nor do I have any flesh and blood kids of my own....

Someone Turned 11 Today....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, C!!!!

You are a decade plus One old today! You are looking more and more like a young woman and less like a kid. Enjoy your kid-dom while you can because the adult world isn't as much fun as you think :) You are smart, funny, witty, loving, caring, thoughtful, athletic, and a Leader. Dad and I are so proud of you!!

Here's hoping 11 is 11 times better than 10....and from what I've seen, 10 was pretty great :)

I'm Still here...

Things have been busy at work and at home, but all is well :)

This past weekend we had C's football game and two weddings all at the very same time. To say we were a little busy, was an understatement :) C did not play so well and her team lost 6-0. However, to be fair, they had only had one practice in almost two weeks due to the holiday and other various things. They will do better this coming week, I am sure :) After her game, we rushed her out to my mom's and changed our clothes real quick for the wedding. We talked about trying to make an appearance at both, but since we didn't make it to the first one until almost 7:30pm, we decided to just stay there.

It was a beautiful wedding, and we had a good time, and even went out with a co-worker of mine afterwards for a bit. However, I wish we would have been able to do both weddings. The one we went to was of a friend of mine from work. The one we missed was Bee's cousin. Oh well. I hear it was nice :)

This week is shaping up to be busy as well! however, our weekend is looking nice and open. This is good, because a certain 10 year old is about to turn 11 on Thursday ;)

Tax THAT!

So, in the midst of all the drama last week, I got a letter in the mail. Seems I "forgot" to file my city taxes for 2010. Yeah. I know. Here's the thing, I was busy doing other important things, like, I dunno, trying to figure out a way to survive and feed my kids on what I make at my job.

I always end up owing. It's not a lot. Like, $60. Sometimes $90-$100. The problem is, I know NOTHING about tax forms or how to fill them out. I also do my own taxes on the computer because I can use a free online software that is *almost* idiot proof and I can handle that. However, they do not offer a city tax program. In the past, it has always worked out that someone has done them for me, and wah-lah! Problem solved. Not last year, though. While I really did intend on filing, it slipped off the top of my mind and, well...here we go. I know people who have not filed their city taxes in 20 years. I do it one year and POOF! I get a summons to Euclid tax court. Great. Awesome. Just what I need.

With all the drama of last week, I sort of pushed it out of my mind. I meant to say something about it at work because I would need to come in late on that day. However,  I just didn't feel like mentioning it. So I did. In the mean time, everyone at work seemed to be taking that day off or leaving early for some reason or another. So you can imagine how great I felt when I realized, yesterday, at 4:30pm, that the day was today.

Shoot.

So, I had to rush around and find my W-2's (Which I had here at work), print off a copy of my federal filings for two years (they seemed to think I owed them two years worth, but it was only one), AND tell my boss that on top of everyone else missing today or leaving early, I needed to come in late.

In the end, it worked out ok. Well, as "ok" as it can. It took me all of 15 minutes in with the tax people. The filed for me. They waived the fees and told me since I only owed one year, they wouldn't charge interest or anything. The pro-rated it for 8 months instead of 12. They also said, they wouldn't put me on a payment plan because it would not be worth my $30. They would just give me a bill and send me on my way and I could mail it in. They didn't give me a due date either which is nice because the down side is, I owe $432.

Yeah. That's what I said.

Dear September. Why do you always hate me?

Thanks for being patient...

Well, everything kind of came crashing down upon me on Wednesday. My biggest fears had been realized, and I found out all my worrying and insecurities were not for naught. I am not really ready to talk about it publicly or candidly just yet. Maybe never.  Just know that I have learned a lot about myself in the last couple of days. I have learned that I have a HUGE heart for those I care about and love. I have learned that love really does have the possibility to conquer all. I have learned that sometimes, your "line in the sand" can be erased and a new one drawn. I have learned that I REALLY can cry for all the waking hours in a day. That sometimes, the ones we love hurt us on levels so deep, we didn't know they existed...yet the only thing that begins to soothe that hurt is just for that same person to hold you so tight while you sob the "ugly cry". That sometimes, you need to step out of yourself and look at the bigger picture. I have also learned that if you let it....if you can allow for the possibility of forgiveness and healing to someday work their way into the picture...if you can just be open to the idea, and  listen, as well as  empty out all the shit, that like a Phoenix, from the ashes of what once was, can be born something new and so much better.

It's been a rough couple of days. Our holiday weekend wasn't what it was supposed to be. In a lot of ways it kinda sucked...but in so many more it was...special. The wagons were circled. There was a lot of crying, talking, yelling, sometimes even screaming and fist pounding...but even more so there was open discussion, walls were torn down, and a weird sort of cleansing thing happened. There was even some laughing, re-connecting, and loving going on. There was loving going on even when there was yelling and fist pounding.

It was a hell of a weekend, ya'll.

As of today....

The kids are just fine. Happy. Thriving. Perhaps bummed that they have to go back to school.
My family and Bee's family are great. My dad arrived safely in Arizona Saturday, I believe.
Mike and I are good too. Really good, actually. There is a lot there that still needs to be taken care of, but I know way down deep in my soul...where only God can see, that he is my true love and that we are meant to be together. Life is going to throw us curves, but we just need to hold onto each other tightly as we can and we will make it through.

I love you, Michael...