Well now we know..and knowing is half the battle, G.I. Joe!

We had our appointment. It went...ok I guess :) I left feeling a little deflated.

I mean, this was only a consultation, and I knew that I wouldn't be leaving, like, pregnant or anything, but it seems a little "far away" if that makes any sense. I mean, Bee told me to make the appointment so we knew where to start. We both agreed we didn't want to have a baby until we were married, and we are currently not married. We are not even officially engaged. So, there's that. Bee keeps telling people we will most like get married "sometime in October". Um. He better properly propose like, a month ago if he wants that to happen. Weddings take time.

Anyway, we talked to the doctor and told her that we were not interested in reversing Bee's vasectomy. It's painful, the percentage chance of us actually conceiving is way low (like less than 5%), and when we do conceive, we would like the benefit of that kind of birth control again so, it really is not worth it. So, our options are for them to get testicular sperm and fertilize my eggs, or use donor sperm.

Both have pros and cons, but really, it comes down to this: to conceive the way we want to (which is using Bee's sperm) they will have to use invetro. The good news is the chance of conceiving is 60% (the average couple just having sex is 20%) and most couples in our situation (no other fertility issues) get pregnant within the first couple of tries. Also, it would be biologically mine and Bee's. The bad news? With medication that is required and the invetro itself, we are looking at $12,000.00 to $15,000.00...each try. Plus, the added fee of the process to remove the sperm from Bee.

If we were to use a donor, our chances of conceiving each moth drop to 10%. All that really means is more tries and more medications. She said healthy couples might have to try 4-5 times. This process costs around $500.00 each try. Oh yeah, and neither way is covered by insurance.

In the end, I just want a baby. I would be ok using a donor. I just worry that it won't feel the same to Bee, ya know? I mean, I know he would love our baby no matter what. I guess I really shouldn't worry. I don't even have a ring yet.

In the mean time, I am to go get these two tests done to check how many eggs I have left to determine how much time I have, and to double check there are no other issues at play. I guess we will decide then!!

Today is kinda important

And I am nervous. I made the doctors appointment weeks ago. Then, forgot about it. Sorta. On purpose. I didn't want to get excited because really, we are just going to talk today. We need to find out what our options are. Can they do the procedure where they go in and remove sperm to fertilize with my egg? Is that done in a petridish, then injected into me? Do the really use a "turkey baster" like Bee says? Will they test Bee's sperm first? How long does the process take? How expensive? Does our insurance cover even a portion of it? Money up-front? If it doesn't work, how many times until we try just a regular old sperm bank? And how do we do that?

As you see, I am full of questions. I also want to know things like, will I need to go on fertility medication? I have never been pregnant. I have never tried either. My family history is kind of a crap shoot of extremes. Some of the women have issues conceiving. Others look at man and they get knocked up. What if they give me fertility medication and due to Bee's and my family history of multiples on both of our maternal and paternal sides, we end up like Kate Gosslin and have 8 kids?!

Hence, why I have tried to not think about today. And, now it's here....and I am nervous...C'mon 3:30!

Meanwhile, I'll just look at my old girl and smile :)

I can't believe I ate the WHOLE thing!

Wow! What a looong 4 days off! We were busy doing nothing at the Monkee-Bee Household. I mean, we did stuff but, for us, it was like doing nothing. Oh yeah, and I think I ate non-stop all 4 days. This year it was going to a smaller than usual crowd for Thanksgiving. The wee bee-lets were going to be with Grandma and Grandpa, and my family was going to be not in attendance. So, it was Bee, J, Grandma Bee, and myself.

Wednesday, I went shopping at lunch. Well, attempted to. My battery in my car died...again. After cursing it out, and getting a jump, I got on my way praying the whole time that it would start after each errand. It did. Then they sent us home early. I went home and promptly put on my yoga pants and over sized t shirt. Then I cleaned, cleaned, swore, and cleaned again. Then I made pies and boiled my eggs for the next day. Bee and I ended the evening curled up with him playing xbox and watching Army Wives with me on my laptop.

Thursday, we woke up and headed down to the school where there was a turkey bowl going on. Bee played wonderfully, but alas, they lost in the last 2 minutes of play. Oh well. :) After some pictures, we headed back home where I jumped on starting dinner. Grandma Bee and I settled on 3pm, but she is always early, so I knew she would be getting there around 2pm and since it was almost 1, I needed to hop to it! I made the deviled eggs (first time ever), and got the sweet potatoes on when Grandma arrived. We put the turkey back in the oven that she brought to keep warm, while we peeled potatoes, and heated up the corn. We set up the relish tray and got the table all set and we all sat down to enjoy and EAT a wonderful meal. It was quiet and relaxing! After dinner, all retired into the living room while I cleaned up what was left (I clean as I go, so really it didn't take me but 5 minutes), and we hung out a bit until Bee's brother and sister in law came over for dessert. Everyone left around 9pm and Bee and I ended our evening the same way as the night before. Xbox and Army Wives.

Friday, Bee let me sleep while he went gun shopping with friends (well there's a sentence I never thought I'd utter). When he came home, he paid for me to go get my nails filled (thank GOD! They needed it!) and then we watched Army Wives while playing xbox until it was time to go meet up with Reggie and have dinner. After dinner we came home and lounged at bit more until bed time.

Saturday, We laid around until around 4pm when we washed, inside and out, both cars, and the motorcycle. Bee had to get a new car last week because his truck died and when they "washed" it for us, they didn't do a very good job getting all the wax off. After that, we went inside and heated up left overs, and lounged around until our friends called and invited us to their bon fire. We went and chatted with them for a bit and had a few beers. We left around 11pm and went home to bed.

Our New Ride! 2005 Buick Rendevous!

Sunday we again rested until around 2pm when Bee had to leave for a football meeting and I got up and started baking because we were having people over for dessert to celebrate all the November Birthdays. We ended up with about 17 people (including us). It was a lot of fun, but I was exhausted by 10pm and was wishing they would go home so I could get ready for the week and go to bed :)

We did a whole lot of resting, but we are going to need it in the coming weeks. Starting today and going every week until February we have as follows: Basketball for little man on Mondays and Wednesdays. Basketball for C on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Games for both (hopefully) on Saturday. Hockey for Bee on Sunday. Add to that Holiday stuff, dentist appoints that are due, Bee and I have our "baby" appointment tomorrow, and my extra doctors appointment for my newly discovered Vitamin deficiency's. (I have to now go monthly for b12 shots, and my Vitamin D that should be between 80-110 is a 5. Yes F-I-V-E, so I am on a prescription strength supplement one time a week. It's 50,000 units where as the over the counter stuff is 20-50 units. I have to have my levels checked once a month for the next 3 months)

I am tired just thinking bout it!! I think I will just keep laughing at this picture of BFF Rose from her trip this Thanksgiving to Tampa Bay Florida to visit her parents :)

Nice Bass  ;)

Turkey Lurkey Do!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

This Thanksgiving is a somewhat new experience for me. Normally, Mama makes at least half of the dinner, and there is a huge crowd of us! This year, not so much. I am really trying hard to stay in the spirit of the season, but my birthday was a flop and I can't shake this "poor me" attitude I have because my family isn't around. I know I am not the first person to not spend their birthday or the holidays with their family. I also understand I am lucky that it's because they are in different states, and not because they are in heaven. Anyway, mama and daddy won't be here. My sister will be with mama for turkey day, and then going to her boyfriends. Daddy is with my aunts, and two cousins. My Brother is....well, not sure where he is going, but he didn't seem interested in making the long drive out to my house and two of my three kids will be off at their grandparents.

However, I am focusing on the fact that I will have a relaxing holiday. I am getting to spend it with my Bee, J, and Grandma Bee. We are also having friends stop by later for dessert :) I am also trying to stay focused on what i am thankful for. In the spirit of that, I will share my list of thankfuls, and I hope to keep those in mind :)

I am thankful for:

-My God. Through him all things are possible!
-My health. I have to go see my doctor about my vitamin levels on Monday, but all in all, I am healthy!
- My family. Immediate, extended, and acquired. We may be states or countries apart, but we are all under the umbrella of family love
-My Bee and my kids, they really are my rock!
-My Job. I complain like everyone else, but it pays the bills and treats me well!
- My car and my house!
- My friends. Especially BFF Rose!


Hope your Thanksgiving is wonderful and you focus on all your blessings too!

Basketball!

Well, we officially started a new sport in our house. Basketball.

Little man wants to play soccer. Not that he is stellar at it. Not that he loves watching it. Not that he even really plays it. It's just that when he was 4, his mom put him in soccer because C was in soccer and it was the thing you did. It was YMCA soccer and they were members of the YMCA. He played one season, and she went away. C started playing football and well, Little man wants nothing to do with that. However, Soccer is during football season and we lost track of time and never got him signed up. Watching him in the back yard though, one thing was evident. Kid has major skills at Basketball. Not that he has ever played organized basketball, but I think there is potential there :)

C wants to play every sport out there, and forgive me for saying, God forbid anyone put any spotlight on a sibling, she can't be outdone. Not to mention, her football coaches keep telling her to play basketball in the off season. It will help her footwork. Also, she has the build for basketball and unfortunately, her opportunities to further her football career after middle school are going to drop significantly, so basketball might be her sport too.

We signed both kids up, and as of last week, they began. C was first because the girls had enough coaches volunteer. The boys did not, so they started a week late. All in all, it was great! Both kids are starting with learning the basic skills and honing them. C has good footwork, but needs to learn ball control, proper dribbling, and work on perfecting her shots. Little Man needs to work on footwork, and not using two hands to dribble, but his shots are nothin but net 85-95% percent of the time! Both kids can teach each other a lot!

They both are doing well and making friends, and looking adorable doing it. To me? As long as they have fun, It was $140 well spent ;)

3rd Grade Fall Concert

Little man had his 3rd grade fall singing concert at school last night. I've decided to start being nice and leaving the ball in the other court. Now that I have the grand parents cell phone number, I have decided to let them know of upcoming events. They chose to come? Well, it will make the kid's day. If not? Well, then it's not on Bee and I (although, in a lot of ways it still would be, but I digress).

After the events of Sunday evening, I had half a mind to tell the Grandparents just what I thought of their daughter and to please pass on a few messages, but I decided against it. Not the time, nor the place. Anyhow, Little man was super excited for us to be there. He was bursting with excitement and kept telling me that he wanted to tell me all the cool stuff they had planned, but didn't want to ruin the surprise :)

He did a great job, and he is such a little ham. His grandparents saved us a seat, which was nice. It was also up closer to the front, which is also nice. Bee doesn't like sitting that close. It made for better pictures ;) In a few weeks, we will do it all again for C!

Another year older.

I turned the big 3-1, yesterday. I wasn't feeling very celebratory. Nothing anyone did, or didn't do. Just, after 30 It just seems like what's the point? I mean, don't get me wrong. I love my life. I love my family. I love that God has seen fit to let me live this long and I am thankful for every breath, for it's not promised. However, there is something about birthdays that makes you get all introspective.

I am not where I thought I would be. While there is nothing wrong with that, it still gives me reason to pause. Also, this year was the first year my mom, dad, and sister didn't come out and spend it with me. Then, my mom called me crying because she almost forgot, and she is broke right now and couldn't afford to send me anything or come see me. She hung up apologizing she "ruined" my birthday. She didn't. She gave me life! She remembered, and wished me happy birthday. That's all I could want :)

I got two cards and a shampoo/conditioner/anti-frizz combo set from Avon from people at work (my Avon lady sits next to me). Bee and the kids sang to me, and we had a giant frozen custard cake :) (pictured above), and I relaxed all evening. Bee kept asking if I was ok, or if I was mad, and I felt bad because it was none of that. I was just blah, but enjoying my relaxation none the less :) Today, a coworker gave me candy, inside of a giant wine glass that holds a whole bottle of wine! As well as a whole bottle of wine! haha! And BFF Rose gave me a coffee basket she made for me filled with my favorite creamers (holiday ones), Dunkin Donuts coffees (Cinnamon, Pumpkin, and Regular), a DD travel mug (.99 refills!) and a $10 gift card to DD.

For all of my introspectivenes, I am super blessed :)

How about Some Hockey, eh?

Well, other than Florida in January, I think Bee's cleats are officially hung up for the season. Just in time to take out his skates! He had his first game on Sunday. His team is Outback Steakhouse :) He did really great! Especially after playing a hard game of football the night before, and driving most of the day! In the end, they won! So far, 0-1 ;) It was a weekend of winning! woot woot!

Indiana Dreams on This Indiana Night

There is a team in our Football League that holds a special place in our hearts. The owners are the nicest, most honest and real people you will ever meet. The other teams are nice, too but we formed a bond with the Diesels. They are like our family. Bee talks with their owner almost every day.

After the season was over, they asked if we would like to be in a post-season contest with them. We agreed, and enjoyed 3 more weeks of football. When we played them, the winner was going to go on to the championship. Bee and Rami decided before the game, that if we won, we would bring Rami on as a coach and let several of his guys wear our uniform and play with our team, and vice versa. Well, they won, and we went and played with them. Afterwards, they got invited to a bowl game championship. One day of football. Teams from all over the Country, and many different leagues. They called Bee and asked him if he would suit up with them. My guy, who can not refuse a game of football, agreed. So, off to Indianapolis we went..

We arrived, and C, as their adopted team mascot, donned her jersey, and helped get things underway.

I hung around and helped my guy get ready and taped up. I helped the team get situated. The opposing team, whose home field we were playing on, looked intimidating. They had 60 guys. Plus, you could tell from the fact that all of the jersey's, pants, and helmets didn't match, that they cherry picked the best guys from the area to come beat up on this team from Detroit. We traveled light for the Diesels with just 25 (The Rams, Bee's team, traveled 18-22 all season...). The coaches said they might look mean, but they were soft. I've heard that before....it doesn't always mean anything. They were making lots of noise, but our guys quietly warmed up, and stretched out. I gave my guy one last kiss, and snapped a picture before retiring to the booth to film.

It's hard to explain to someone who doesn't watch a lot of football. While the score is the deciding factor of who wins, or who loses, it doesn't not tell the story of the game. There were many games this season with our Rams where we lost 48-27 or 27-0 (like our last meet-up with the Diesels), but the story of the game was, we kicked their butts all over the field. We made them work hard for their points, home cooking from the refs, bad calls, or critically timed injuries prevented us from the W's. Now, that's not to say that our team doesn't need a lot of work. Lots of Discipline and better coaching and we will be championship contenders. Until then, we will be 1-9. Anyway, the final score ended up being 14-8. Diesels won!!! While that score says it was a close game, it really wasn't. Even with their 60 guys and "ringers", we handed them their behinds all game. Their one touchdown was luck and a little help from the refs. We had a 3rd touchdown as well, but it was called back on a BS call. Either way, we will take it!!

The Diesels are national champions. They get to go to Florida and play in the Semi-Pro Super bowl games. While it would taste so much sweeter if it was our Rams, we were proud to be a part of it!! The guys love Bee, and swear if it weren't for him being there, this game probably would have went the other way. In the post game huddle, they gave him MVP. It made him choke up :)

Coach Al recognizing Bee

Bee choking up

All in all, dreams were made that night. Goes to show our Rams that a bunch of guys from the ghetto can be professional and do great things!! Congrats Detroit Diesels!!!

After the game, Bee, C, and I started back in the direction of home. We stopped off at Motel 6 about 20 miles outside of Indianapolis and got a room, and grabbed some food at Denny's. Have to say, I was impressed with Motel 6. I will let them leave the light on for me in the future! :) Sunday, we got up early and headed home. Bee had Hockey to get ready for. All in all, it was a great weekend :) Next time, we will stop and visit Bee's brother and Sister-in-law as we passed through Columbus! :) We at least waived as we drove by ;)

Hobbling along..

Well, It's Day 4, and I am still limping on :) I have this bandage until Wednesday. It makes life difficult, to say the least. My family? Yeah, I got pity for about 6 hours before it was back to folding (more like wadding) laundry, and making dinner. Oh well.

If having a bandaged hand wasn't enough, I went and had my lab work done today as well as my scheduled yearly girlie doctor. I am glutton for punishment, I suppose. Ha! Anyway, my doctor said all my girl parts were good as far as she could tell, and sent me on my way with a phone number and name of the best doctor in town that works with couples like Bee and I who want a baby, but have been medically altered so that's not possible. Apparently, he has a high success rate and the whole process of going in and getting the little swimmers is quite common. Yay for that! Now, we just need to get an appointment with that guy and maybe soon I can have a baby! :)

Recovering...

I had my hand surgery yesterday. All went well, and I am home resting. However, I am in a big bandage and more pain than I expected. The weird thing? It doesn't hurt where they cut me (at least not yet...it's still numb), it hurts in the joint where my pointer finger meets my palm (the cyst was on my middle finger) where they gave me the nerve block. Oh well, I have my happy pills :)

Also, I entered one of my fall pictures in a photo contest! I let Bee pic which one :) I could win$500!
Cross your fingers! (cuz I can't tee hee ;)  )