Tuesday, November 16, 2010

I have a soap box, and I am not afraid to use it!

Warning, I am going to express my opinion here on a few things.

I know, weird, because this is my blog, where I write about all things me...but just so you know. You may not agree with me.

Which is also weird, considering it's my personal opinion, and opinions are like A-holes, and every one's got one...


Bullies and the "G" word.

Ok, I'm going to come out and say it. When it comes to bullying, put your big kid panties on and deal with it. Listen, I was the fat kid. Not just a little chunky, but fat. F-A-T fat. I had one friend. She was the skeleton why-don't-you-eat-something- skinny nerd. Funny thing was, she ate like a horse, and I hardly ate at all. But, I digress.

Anyway, When I was growing up, I was made fun of every.single.day. Kids are mean. For 7 years of my school career, I came home every day and cried. Begged my mom and dad not to send me back. Do you know what they did? They hugged me tightly, stroke my hair, wiped my tears, and told me they loved me. They also told me Kids are mean. Mostly, because they themselves are insecure, or possibly even made fun of too. I was expected to get up, put the best smile on that I could muster, and basically sack up. Mama told me there will always be one person who wants to be mean and ignorant, but that doesn't mean we have to let them alter our lives. Life isn't fair. Not everyone is nice. You need to learn how to cope. She also told me, if anyone ever laid a hand on me, to sock 'em one good time, and they would learn to leave me alone. However, only if they touched me first.

The problem with today is that this whole freaking generation has been coddled and had their hands held. They played youth sports where there was never a "winner" because "Everyone's a winner!". Everyone got a trophy, because "Everyone did their best". No one tries out for anything because everyone, regardless of skill level, is allowed to play. The kids with actual talent get benched the second the team starts doing well because it's not "fair" to the other team.

That's Bullshit. It really is. You think you are doing your kids a favor by letting them always be happy, never have their feelings hurt, and spared from ever having true competition. The only thing it does is leave them with the lack of ability to cope because life ISN'T fair, you DON'T always win, people AREN'T always nice, and sometimes it's just because they don't WANT to be, and even if you play by all the rules, you DON'T always win. How can you experience the real joy of working hard towards something and maybe even beating out someone else, if you don't know what it's like to lose?

These kids become teenagers and teenagers are less likely to be in a controlled environment. Being a teenagers involves mood swings. Happy, Sad, Hyper, Depressed, Anxious, Mean, Feisty, Giddy. They are walking balls of hormones. They are vying for their place in their social world. They pick out the weak and seek to build themselves up by putting the easy targets down. You see it every day in nature. In the wild, the weakest buck of the pack ends up alone. The strong survive. You either learn to adapt, or you are left out in the cold. However, since we have not allowed our children to experience being the "loser", or having their feelings hurt, they can't deal. Hence why you see such a rise in teen suicide. Their fragile physche can't handle it.

Is bullying right? Am I saying I advocate bullying? HELL NO! If you are being bullied or see someone being bullied, you should definitely tell someone. But, there is nothing wrong with going up to the person and confronting them. Show them you are not scared of them and they can't hurt you. Bullies lose interest fast if you don't cower like they want you too. If all else fails, pop em in the mouth. When I was growing up, you tried setting things the correct way and when that didn't work, it was 3pm at the flagpole. Most of the time, the bully is all talk and wouldn't show...or they would, but wouldn't really hit you....and then they lost all their power. I like how it's talked about more in school's these days. I like how teachers are more vigilant and that there is "no tolerance" rules, but parents? You need to seriously let your children know, this is all part of life and to man up because it surely doesn't get any easier and if you can't handle some kid calling you fat, gay, sissy, beanpole, nerd, whatever, you will NOT be able to handle even a job at McDonald's.

Now, on the the "G" word.


That's so Gay. You're so gay. So on, and so forth.

I have a gay cousin. One time, I slipped and said that something was "gay" around him and I got so embarrassed. He told me, "If I said "that's so hetero", would you be offended?" and I said that I would not be. He said, "Ok, because it's just a word, right? and in my context, you know that I am not bashing heterosexuals" and I said yes. He said "Well, that's how I take the word "gay". Gay means happy anyway. Homosexual means my sexual orientation. My friends and I say "That's gay" all the time".

That's how I feel. I say it too. Not as much as I used to, mainly because I am sick of having the same argument with the same stupid people over and over again. However, I do say it. It's a manners thing. It's also a preference thing. Some people don't like the word "stupid" and others don't like "retarded". That's your choice and if you teach your kids that those are "bad" words, that's your choice too, and I respect that. I don't care either way. If I know one of my friends doesn't like those words, I try not to use them around them out of respect I have for my friend. However, if they came at me like some sort of word police telling me what I can and can not say, on my facebook, in public, in a private conversation with them or someone else, to that I am going to say that I am a grown ass person and can say and do what I want with in the realm of the law.

I can't STAND when people try to insert their personal beliefs, by force, on others. I think it's wrong to kill an unborn baby, but it's legal, and if you chose to do it, I'm not going to stop you. The "N" word makes me cringe, yet I have African American friends who call each other that all the time. Now, do I think that they think of each other a oppressed, ignorant slaves? No. I know that it's just a word they call each other. Even if I walked up on two black people standing on a street corner and one said to the other "What's up, my N****?" I would know, that it was a greeting, meaning no harm or hate. Same thing with Gay.

If I say "Gay people Suck!" That's hate. If I say, "That's so gay!" then, it's just a word to mean it's lame. Or, it could even mean, it's hip. I just can't stand all the censoring not to hurt people's feelings. Grow up and get over yourselves. Stop picking apart every little thing people do. Seriously.

/ end rant.